Unconditional

I was scratching my head today and I felt a slight pain in my finger. I found a hair splinter in my finger. I need to start using conditioner.

Wahaha!

Thank you Robz for showing me this goodness. Amazing.

A Day to Remember

I woke up this morning from a dream. I saw myself failing the road test for the second time in a row in a month's time. Lost every ounce of confidence I had in me right there. I didn't feel ready for the road test that would take place in a few hours.

Fast forward to 1:30pm. The test has been delayed 20 minutes and the examiner comes 5 minutes late herself. This was after I saw my last examiner go by in another car. Whew. Lady drops in the car after asking me to give her signals and such. We head off.

It took me almost a minute to pull out of the parking spot. It's downhill and the road is one way. Pretty tight. Already not the greatest start, but I get no checks or crosses. Still okay for now. I make sure I do my blindspot checks this time. But then I forget to signal right when I turn. I decided it was the only direction, but it was a risky move. But her hand didn't move. Good to go. We go the same route as last time.

She asks me to do a downhill park on a residential street. I do it. No checks that I remember now. We then keep going and I remember having a not so smooth stop at the stop sign. I turn right and do a three point turn. No sweat. Kinda slow though. I take the car back out onto the main road after.

I'm told to make a right turn on a major intersection. I stick the front of the car out as the numbers under the pedestrian light ticks down. Some guy's crossing the street. I don't remember how far away he was; the street was around 6 lanes wide in total. I stop and wait for him. Some anus of a driver honks from behind. I hope he crashed. The examiner looked back at the other driver. No marks off for me because it wasn't my fault. I make my turn and all is well. But the paranoid fear of getting marks off or even failing for getting honked at lingered.

I pull into a small street that leads to the test centre. "Turn left at the stop sign," she said. I shoulder check and switch to the left lane. I stop at the stop sign and go when it's my turn. I went straight. "Left turn!" Oh mother-. "Oh right here? Sorry..." I keep going. I don't dare pull a crazy left turn in the middle of the intersection. I was certain I failed right then and there. She already sounded pretty rude already. She needs a new job. Or maybe I caught her at a bad time of the month. I was taught recently that a high tide brings emotions crashing down on innocent bystanders, and I guess on stressed out new drivers, too. Maybe especially them.

I pull into the plaza, still certain of my consecutive epic failure at Port Union. I roll slowly to the next stop sign. "Turn left." I see a car parked on the right side of the left lane, and the driver just walked out from a store to enter his car. I figure I might wait for him to move out of the way so it's a bit safer. "Let's go, please." More than a hint of frustration in her tone. Yup I'm done like dinner. After I make the turn I see a pretty big speed bump. I remember asking my instructor just before what the max speed should be when going past speed bumps. She said 20-30 km/h usually. So I go at 20. Wow she almost died right beside me. I know something did in the trunk. "Maybe you should go a little slower this time." My voice was so subdued by that time I could barely hear my own apologies. We go slowly again until we reach the back alley parking of the test centre. I'm asked to do a back in, which I do hesitantly and extra carefully. I must admit just seconds before that I thought of not caring about doing well because I had failed already. But I figured I'd keep at it just because. I didn't give myself a counterargument. I just tried my best til the end.

I back in not so smoothly and do all the brakes. "Aren't you gonna fix this?" "Oh." So I do. I was a little too close to the car on my side, and quite a bit of space on hers. I pull out leaning on the right, then straighten it out before backing in. "You're not turning the wheel. You're gonna end up at the exact same spot as before." I slowed my reverse. I had no clue what she was talking about, but I didn't wanna ask because I'd look like an idiot if I did probably. So I just finished what I was doing. It all looked fine to me. We both had enough space to get out. Neither of us are fat. Well I've been working out so I can destroy a car by walking into it, but what can you do. I turn it all off as she asked and we went over it.

"This test could've gone either way. You're way too slow. But I'm giving you a pass..." The rest of her words fell on deaf ears. God answers prayers. Thank You!

The rest of the day was a blur.