Reflections

Despite the axiom all high school students are familiar with, I found university much less difficult than expected. The first few days of school, I did find the environment a tad intimidating, with lecture halls packed with over 2000 students. The change from a class of 30 or so people to a mass of students no younger, but some definitely older than me made me feel insignificant. A mere drop of water in a pond. I scribbled down everything I heard during the lectures, which often left me with an aching hand. On Tuesdays between my two classes, a 3 hour break from 11:30 to 2:30, I would wander around campus aimlessly, because I had no friends.

But it did not take me long to adjust to the new life. The torrents of students that flowed through the halls no longer fazed me. I started relaxing during lectures rather than copying every word down incessantly. It allowed me to absorb the lesson with a more focused mind. There were times when I even left without any notes for the lesson. At times I even napped. I don't encourage this sort of thing for you grade 12s out there, but if you can pull it off and get great grades, a nap here and there can't hurt much. On Tuesdays, I no longer walked around campus like a lonely idiot because none of my friends had the same break as I did. I skipped the last lecture and went home at 11:30. Again, I don't encourage this kind of behaviour, unless the course is NATS 1960 and your "professor" is Jan Sapp. To you prospective and current York students, stay away from Sapp's Evolution course. A waste of time and money. I did well on the course, so I could afford to miss the lecture for more important things in my life. (By the way, I know this layout of text is not visually pleasing to the reader, but just bear with me. I'm too lazy to make this screen-user-friendly.)

University assignments did somewhat live up to its hype, however. The tasks were more complicated and lengthy, but still manageable. Although difficult to complete, the number of assignments through the entire year was small overall. That decreased my stress level for sure. Not that I get stressed easily. I have stayed up late on several occasions to finish my work, but the only reason I had to was because I procrastinated.

(As those who have checked my blog recently can see, this entry was not posted the day I wrote it. I planned to finish writing this on another day, but I don't feel like it anymore. I'll leave this as is.)

Is He fair?

A few hours ago, a question was raised by a friend of mine. Why does God allow the innocents to be slaughtered? It isn't fair of Him to let the helpless die, is it? No, it isn't. He isn't fair. It's not fair that some people never knew who God was before they died and are sentenced to an eternity in hell to suffer. It's not fair that the poor stay poor and the rich and greedy get wealthier. It's not fair that children are raised in broken families and become psychologically unsound. God is not fair. It's also not fair that Jesus descended to our level to suffer humiliation and torture in the hands of His creation either. So before we turn God away for the injustice we face in our lives, remember the Cross and what it represents. We do not deserve to be saved, but through His grace, we are invited to join Him in heaven. And most importantly, it is up to us accept the invitation.

And happy 19th birthday to Carmen!

no real title again

Here I am again, late Saturday night. Today's the day when us unfortunate habitants of Toronto lose an hour of sleep. Perfect time to be wide awake at this hour. I tossed and I turned in my bed for over an hour, and I just can't fall asleep. I figured if I poured out my thoughts and emotions on this, I would be exhausted and have a clear mind when I go back to bed.

Let's refer back to the topic I spoke of in my previous entry a few hours ago. With the recent events that have been going on, specifically the Schiavo case and the passing of Pope John Paul II, I've been thinking about the controverseys on determining a person's life and death.

I don't know too much about the Schiavo case, but from the bits and pieces I hear and read from the news, she has been denied further medical support and nutrition, and is left to starve to death. What a horrific and agonizing way to go. Do we have the right to decide whether a person lives or dies? Or even whether we ourselves live or die? As a Christian, I know God breathed life into every one of us. It is not our choice to end our lives whenever we wish. Life is not ours to take away. Life was never ours.

But at the same time, do we have the right to postpone death? If a person's body is so badly damaged that they cannot survive on their own, do we have the right to delay their meeting with God? What is the reason to live, if living is no more than suffering? And I don't mean suffering as Job suffered, but paralyzed on a hospital bed, knowing your body is deteriorating gradually with no chance of recovery, when thoughts and feelings cannot be put into action and you're nothing but a waste of money, energy, and time for those around you. Is this not a form of torture as well?

Some may argue that God gave humans the ability to heal the human body to the point of survival, and thus must be what God intended for the doctors to do. God, however, also gave humans the ability to clone, and that's immoral by His standards. Just because we are capable, it does not always mean we should take action.

So what choices are we left with, if leaving someone to die is just as bad as keeping one alive to suffer? It is always in my best interest to take away the pain of others, and in this case, it would be death. But surely there must be a better way to end one's misery than to starve them. If I were the doctor and the patient's death would be my responsibility, I would carry it out swiftly. A painles injection would be ideal in my opinion. However, I also believe that current technology is not completely reliable. A test that shows a patient has no chance of recovering can easily be flawed, and such errors have occured I'm sure. I would never forgive myself if I denied a person's chance to live.

This is a very delicate situation that society faces today, if not the most significant. I'm not gonna try to come up with a solution to this problem. I've taxed myself writing this piece. My plan is successful. Goodnight/morning to you all.

Bleh

I was gonna write about something deep, until the window closed on me and I lost all my writing. I'll be at it again when I get my writing mood back. Sucks.